Alcyone Island Special Edition

Ding Dong Walkers Dead!
By Jessica Wright

December 2nd, 2014 - The Terenzio's could not have given the world a better gift, and just in time for Christmas. Lucas Walker, the Secretary of Defense for the World Management Team of suck is dead! He did not, as the lying papers of the WMT News proclaim, die in his sleep. He was killed by Liliana and Carissa Terenzio. Women power!!

Here are the details that Dion Corp PR President Marilyn Pearl - Terenzio shared with us. The Terenzio's found the location of a very important, formerly secret WMT base. All manner of prisoners charged with no crime except hating the New World Order of suck were kept there, along with a few things that were probably important to the WMT. Our brave team of soldiers, Army and Air force combined, charged the base, freed the prisoners, killed Lucas Walker, then blew that motha sky high! Oh happy day!

While the rest of the sleeping, completely unaware world has their little candle light vigil in honor of Satan's passing (you can't see it, but I'm gagging) we, the people of Alcyone, should throw a freaking party and officially declare December 2nd, Terenzio day. I'm open to different name suggestions. Call them into Jah Rah's morning show tomorrow and we'll march down to City hall in celebration and make it so.

Ding Dong Lucas Walker is dead! Another point in the name of real freedom! Once again, thank you Terenzio!

The New United Nations
By Julius Kasey

December 2nd, 2014 - We all remember the death of Freedom. The frightful day when we realized that something had happened to the world, that Nazi Germany had resurrected, a demon with a new face and what seemed to be ungodly power. There was no end in sight and the cold hand of fear touched many of us. Lucky for us, you can't beat down freedom, you can't take away choice, and there will always be those who stand up to bullies. Like the Terenzio's for example. But, they are not alone. Yesterday, The Dion Corporation announced that the New United Nations building is complete. Already, the countries of Morocco, Egypt, India, Singapore, Brazil, Colombia, and Puerto Rico will be sending Ambassadors to take up space within their walls. The building itself is magnificent, a shinning diamond in the sand, a beacon of hope for the world.

"I cannot tell you how happy I am that so many nations have bravely stood up to join us. Together, we will find a way to wake up the people and rid the world of its current tyranny. And we won't rest until it's done," Marcello Terenzio said at news conference late yesterday evening.

Officially the building will not open until January 1st, 2015. There's a rumor the Terenzio's will be throwing a party for the Ambassadors and themselves to bring in the new year. Beg Santa to get you a guest ticket. I am.